Veterans Match Report

Saturday 19^th April 2008

Havant Mariners 12 – 7 Portsmouth Veterans

All

What if…………….. Blucher had arrived at Waterloo 20 minutes later? Would Napoleon have won?    What if………… Ultravox had released ‘Vienna’ 3 weeks later, would they have hit the No 1 spot so cruelly denied to them by Joe Dolce’s ‘Shaddup You Face’ in 1981?

These major historical events changed the face of the world for ever just because of the TIMING involved!!! Such a world changing occurrence happened on Saturday when Chalky White arrived 20 minutes late to join the fray in this most keenly contested of derby matches! Had he not been saving the country’s property market crisis single-handedly that morning, would he have arrived in time to prevent the Mariners from recording their first victory in 5 outings? I think we all know the answer, even the Mariners, but it wasn’t to be!

Coincidently, the last time the Mariners beat Portsmouth Vets was when White guested for them a couple of seasons ago along with that other demi-centenarian, Bernie Mallinder! Enough said!

Anyway, the match had kicked off and Havant had scored an unconverted try before White ran in to view from behind the first team pitch. As he did so, the Mariners let out a collective groan as they realised their easy ride was up and as their heads dropped, Dave Ladd seized the opportunity to run through the lack-lustre defence to score a fine try, superbly converted by Sean Godkin. The throng of children waiting on the line for their hero had to wait for their photos and autographs as The Great White was called in to action immediately. Apparently, Mark Borrowdale had been delayed at the check out in Dorothy Perkins and a speedster was required until he arrived out on the left wing.

Immediately, Havant sought to counter this threat and pulled Phil McLean out of the pack to centre and whenever Portsmouth attacked through Andy Lewis and centres Bernie and Sean, a phalanx of Havant players were ready to pounce on White! Playing with the wind and slope, the Portsmouth pack were starting to take control up front but the Havant boys were ruling the break down. Some good possession was spurned by knock-on’s or dropped balls by the Havant backline but stalwart Jim Lynch at full-back, kept a steady head and settled his inexperienced backs. The normal Havant/Portsmouth battle of close quarter forward driving and limited offence through the backs continued until half time when the score was 7-5 to the visitors.

The half time break saw Jon Whitehouse limp off with a severe hangover which enabled White to return to the back row as the slower Bungle stepped up to the second row to join Roger Highgate. Newly arrived Mark Borrowdale joined Dougie Campbell on the flank and a better balanced side was ready for the second half. The first 20 minutes was blood and thunder stuff with Havant realising that if they didn’t beat Portsmouth today, they never would again. Time after time, Dave Jones at scrum half made telling kicks for territory down the slope and the grateful home pack were able to keep run in to rucks and mauls. Brilliant defence by Mallinder, Lewis, Godkin and Campbell saved the day on a several occasions and rear guard actions by Jonah Jones and Yorkie Smith frustrated the home initiative with some fantastic defensive duties. The set piece was still going Portsmouth’s way and Mike Caspall made hay with sniping runs from the scrum and ruck which Havant found hard to counter. With White at open side, the battle on the floor was easily going Portsmouth’s way and the whole match had increased in intensity.

The breakthrough came after a penalty was awarded to the home side which was quickly taken by Dave Jones who almost sprinted through a hole in the retreating defence. Gavin Hindle valiantly brought him down but not before the pass had been off-loaded to Phil McLean who galloped away to score the winning try, converted by Jones. Portsmouth fought back with renewed vigour and was camped on the Havant line for the rest of the match.  Wave after wave was repulsed by the tiring home pack. Bungle and Cuffy enjoyed the friendliest of exchanges in the line out while Andy Lewis almost got through followed by Yorkie and then Geoff Bullard who made the try line. White, as usual, was on hand to rip the ball from him and dive for the whitewash only to find all 8 Havant forwards throwing themselves Kamikaze style to the floor to prevent the ball being grounded. Havant were playing their hearts out and when the referee blew for no-side, they were the deserved victors of this most thrilling of games.

But, what if the match had been played at 3pm rather than 1.30? What if White had played the whole game? What if Tony Blair was still Prime Minister? Conundrums all!!

Regards

Chalks